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Photograph
zprymantis@smilingwithteeth.com
Freddie was in charge. He'd been in charge since their mother
died. They walked along the railroad tracks toward the photographer's
store front. Elizabeth was careful not to fall. She was told by
Freddie that if she fell and messed up her dress she would be
spanked with the stick he was swiping through the air. Freddie
was just about grown compared to his three younger sisters. He
was twelve.
Elizabeth grabbed her younger sister Mamie's hand to help her
balance while they hopped from plank to plank. Mamie hadn't learned
to talk yet as she was only two. Anna was older then Elizabeth
but just didn't seem to understand Mamie the way Elizabeth did.
Elizabeth knew that keeping Mamie busy hopping on the tracks would
keep her from squatting down to pick up rocks and picking weeds.
Mamie had learned to walk a few months ago and would sit down
unexpectedly in the dirt and examine things closely at a moments
notice.
Anna complained that Freddie should have gone down the Avenue
and not the back way to the photographer's store. She was nine
and had been walking to school for a number of years and knew
her way around the city. Freddie said that walking on the Avenue
was for sissies and that the trolly cars were more dangerous then
this route anyway. Then he noticed Mamie's shoes.
"You are scuffing up her shoes Elizabeth! I swear I will whip
you if you don't stop."
"You shouldn't have us walking the docks then, stupid!" Elizabeth
shouted back.
With that Freddie stormed up next to her and grabbed her around
the waist, tossed up her dress and smacked her repeatedly with
his switch. Elizabeth could feel the red stripes criss-crossing
her panties and cutting into the tender flesh of her upper thighs.
Anna quickly stepped forward to hide the scene from Mamie's wide
eyes. Elizabeth refused to cry, she wouldn't cry, she couldn't
as it would ruin the photo. She took the full force of Freddie's
frustration in silence. When he was through, he scowled at her
reminding her he was older and smarter and was in charge of her.
Elizabeth just looked down, afraid she might cry and cause Mamie
to start crying too. After a few moments of dead quiet, where
only the pounding of the waterfront machinery could be heard,
the four of them continued on their journey as if nothing had
just transpired. Elizabeth knew how important the photos were
to her Papa. He cherished them. It was important that Mamie's
shoes not be scuffed and for her eyes to not be puffy.
Their living room was filled with photos. They weren't a rich
family, they didn't have a horseless buggy like some, but the
front room of their row house was the "sitting room" and it was
as fancy as the best of them. The family photos lined the walls
and Elizabeth liked the chore of dusting the tables on Saturday
mornings. She would look into the eyes of her mother and father
standing side by side with baby Freddie between them. She also
looked at her missing brother and sister who died from the fever
that had killed so many. If the older brother and sister were
alive would they spank Freddie? The thought always made her smile.
Her Uncle Jack was there too, staring back at her. He had died
from malaria in South America.
Elizabeth wondered if when she died someone would stare into her
eyes at the picture being taken today. She tried not to listen
to Freddie swoshing his stick, or Anna whining about how tight
her shoes were. She concentrated on other things as she held little
Mamie's hand.
"Look Mamie, see if you can walk like this, prance like a little
pony," Elizabeth said to encourage her not to drag her new shoes
against the rocks.
That's when Elizabeth saw it, a shiney pin glittering near the
tracks. She quickly picked it up and held it in her hand. She
focused intently on the pin and wondered how it had come to be
alone out here on the tracks.
Finally without further incident they arrived at the photograph
studio. He lined them up, Elizabeth and Mamie in the front, Freddie
and Anna behind. Freddie no longer held his stick, it was propped
outside the door waiting for their walk home. Anna erased her
sour expression and managed a pleasant stare. They all heeded
the "don't smile or move" warning and then just as the flash was
about to go off the photographer stopped and frowned at Elizabeth.
"Have you something in your hand young lady?" Elizabeth had been
opening and closing the pin. He told her to toss it away and then
come back to her assigned spot.
Elizabeth walked to the front door and pretended to throw the
pin out onto the cobblestone. She walked back to her position,
her hands clasped in front of her, the pin still there, a soft
smile on her lips as the picture flashed.
Ninety years later I enjoy dusting the living room tables and
staring into my grandmother's eyes. Her tiny hands clasped and
holding the little pin, Mamie's shoes poking out from under her
long dress. Anna and Freddie behind them looking so much older
and wiser.
© 2000 by zprymantis@smilingwithteeth.com, not to be reposted or distributed
without permission
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